As a runner for more than thirty years, I've been on both the giving and receiving end of advice. Runners, in general, are both eager to help and easily overwhelmed by the volume of information available. Sometimes it takes a filter to help advice make sense. I've started using a 'turkey' filter for running advice.Turkeys have been given a bad name in running. For example, 'turkey' is the term used to refer to unregistered runners, the bane of timers using the venerable chutes and spindles timing system. When these scofflaws cross the finish line they mess up the syncing of finish times and finish tags. The solution? Place a 'turkey tag' on the spindle. Chip timing has made that issue less common, but the term remains in use. In case you're not a hunter (or a turkey), you may not know that 'turkey tags' also refers to a hunting requirement that your harvest be properly labeled. This is not a popular term in the flock.
Most people don't realize that turkeys are quite good runners. We're used to the overfed, under-exercised fatties that end up on our dinner tables for Thanksgiving. Their wild cousins weigh half as much and can run 20 miles per hour. That's three minutes per mile, and they can fly twice that speed.
I've been reading Born to Run, a fascinating story about our true human capacity for distance running. I decided to check in with my friend Tom Turkey to see if we humans could learn something from our feathered friends. Tom was gracious enough to provide a list of helpful hints for your running pleasure.
Tom writes:
"Thanks for the opportunity. Running has been a big part of my life. I really think it has made me a better bird. I look forward each day to my run. Whether I'm going long or just running away, running puts a smile on my beak.
"I've compiled my seven favorite tips. I hope you enjoy. Have a safe Thanksgiving, and remember to go vegetarian!
- "Shoes are for sissies. I don't know one turkey that wears shoes on a regular basis. Try barefoot running for an authentic experience. The Born to Run guy got that right.
- "Forage on long runs. I prefer acorns and seeds, but you might go with gel or goo.
- "Water means life. I wouldn't think of running without a stream nearby. If you don't live near water, or don't like to bend over and lap it up, bring a water bottle.
- "Know when to peak. I'm always at my leanest this time of year, and frankly it has saved my life. If you're getting ready for a race, prepare like your life was on the line. Really.
- "Strut your tail feathers. Okay, this one is more about getting a date, but it's good for your running too. If you've got it, flaunt it!
- "Find a flock. I wouldn't spend winter without one. Find someone to share your runs, or at least listen to your stories.
- "Don't stuff yourself. I also wouldn't let anyone else do it to you."
Think of Tom's advice as you celebrate Thanksgiving this year. One flock you may want to join, is the crowd gathering for the annual Turkey Run the Sunday before Thanksgiving. Tom will be there, though he keeps a low profile after the incident with the starting pistol a few years ago. You will find him on the race shirt, as usual. He's a big fan of tip #5.
